Tale As Old As Time
by LinZE
Summary: Remember the episode ‘Threshold’? Good, now forget the last scene (the one where J tells P it’s OK they had sex). This is set just after their rescue by the rest of the Voyager crew but this time Chakotay realised that to leave their offspring behi


SUMMARY: If you're sitting comfortably?  Remembered the episode 'Threshold'? Good now forget the last scene (the one where J tells P it's OK they had sex).  This is set just after their rescue by the rest of the _Voyager _crew but this time Chakotay realised that to leave their offspring behind would be a direct breach of the prime directive.

DISCLAIMER: All the characters and the like used in this story do belong to Paramount and no infringement was intended.

            Tom was concerned.  It had been almost thirty-six hours since his transformation from super-evolved salamander-type-thing back into human had been complete and he'd been awake for the last twelve but as of yet the Captain had made no signs of returning to consciousness.  He hoped she was all right.  This brought him to the three little bundles in the corner of the sickbay. The EMH and Kes were taking a great deal of care in ensuring for their needs, he was so proud that he was their father but it didn't seem right unless he new that their mother felt the same way.  The doctor had insured him that it really was expected that the Captain would take longer to recover.  After all, in the relatively short time between when he had abducted her (he still cringed at the thought of that) and their rescue, she had not only been genetically thrown to the future and back she had given-birth to triplets.

"Maybe you should try and get some sleep Tom."  Suggested Kes, her soft tones drawing him back to the now.  He looked from the cribs to the still form of Kathryn Janeway and then up into her caring eyes.

            Once-upon-a-time Kes knew that Tom had convinced himself that he loved her but she had also known that these feelings were only as real as the doctor was human.  They both cared deeply for each other's as friends, but that was all.  She knew as well as she did that his affections had lain with the same woman ever since they had set eyes on each other in the penal colony back on Earth.  Now these feelings were more obvious than ever.  "She'll be fine."  She reassured him.  It wasn't in her nature to lie but-

… well, physically the doctor was confidant Janeway would recover fully.  It was the other aspects that had Kes worried; the whole warp ten fiasco was would have been a shock to anyone but to add onto that waking up to find that there were another three helpless tiny individuals on board that were entirely dependant on you?  There had been discussions on what would happen to the infants if things didn't work out but both she and the EMH were intent on giving their parents every opportunity to be just that.  She looked up as one of the babies stirred.  The EMH was nearby but she decided to go and see what was wrong.  She placed a gentle hand on Tom's forearm and smiled as she made her way to where the newly replicated cots were lying.  She leant over and reached out to pick up the little boy who was girning restlessly.  He promptly proved that he had a fully functioning set of lungs.

            Kathryn was surrounded by a warm comforting fog.  She was quite happy to remain in that state until she heard a cry that cut through the mist like a lighthouse through the dark.  It was a child – that much she was sure of and it was calling to her.  Her eyes were wide open before she had a chance to think.  Sitting up, rather too fast, she felt distinctly light-headed.  When the room had stopped spinning, or at least slowed slightly, she headed over to where the noise was coming from.  She took no heed of her surroundings, acting purely on impulse; it seemed almost like a burning desire or need within her.  She had to find the child and comfort it close to her.

            "Kes!"  Said the EMH looking straight past the elfin-like woman.

"Captain…"  She responded genuinely glad to see her up if slightly surprised.  Her words faded as the woman neared however and she saw the look on her face.  It was of pure concern and love, her arms were outstretched and the feelings that almost overwhelmed the telepath left her in no doubt about handing the infant over.  The boy's reaction on finding his mother's arms was almost immediate.  Within seconds his crying had stopped.  A smile spread across Kes' face in response to that on Janeway's.  However, the doctor stepped in just in time as the effort it had taken the new mother to reach her child took its toll and reeled violently.  Supporting her he motioned for Kes to help her back towards her own bed.  By the time she was there and the EMH had ensured she was well propped up with pillows Tom Paris had poked his head round the side of the semi transparent partition.

"Captain."  He said just loudly enough to catch her attention.  She looked up and Kes noticed something in her eye that she had rarely seen.  They glistened with the threat of tears that were expertly held back.  The look that passed between the two lasted only seconds but said more than a thousand words.

"You're all right?"  She asked shifting her gaze from the child sitting close to her chest to its father.

"Yes."  He answered his voice tremering ever so slightly.  "And you?"  She nodded in response. Then it was almost as if she remembered something else and looked over towards the other two cribs.  Kes, realising what was going on, quickly went over and wheeled the other two across to make the gathering complete.  Then seeing he had finished his scans motioned the doctor to come with her and leave them alone.

"I realise that you must have a lot to talk about but," He said before walking away. " I don't want either of you getting tiered out."  With that he headed for his office but disintegrated before he got there.  Kes took her own advice and headed for the door.  If they needed anything the EMH would be close at hand and it had been a while since she had seen Neelix.

            Tom didn't know what to say.  He bent down and picked up one of the other children. He had envisaged what this discussion might involve but none of his carefully planned words seemed appropriate.

"I'm sorry."  He said eventually.

"What for?"  She asked sounding genuinely perplexed.

"For abducting you, for dragging you into this.  I would, I mean I understand if you never want to see my face again."  He said looking into the face of the tiny girl he held in his arms.  She was beginning to wake up.  The doctor had estimated their age at about a week and this one had yet to open her eyes.  She did then and Tom found himself staring into two sparkling grey pools that differed from Kathryn's only in youth and what their mother's held in experience.

"I think that this situation might make that slightly difficult."  She told him making sure he saw her tired smile.

"I mean that if you, well if you didn't want to look after them…"

"How could I do that?  I feel as though they're a part of me.  Do you honestly think I could hand them over to someone else to look after?  Could you?"  He didn't need to think before he answered.

"No."  She was right he could never agree to that.

"Well then like I said.  I'll take them if you would like but," She paused "I think that wherever possible children should be brought up in a home with two parents – even if they're only friends."

"Captain," He started, he wanted to say a hundred things at once.

"I think if we're going to be living in rather close quarters I might just let you call me Kathryn."

He smiled.  She had always been able to make the joker laugh.  The other girl who was still lying in her crib woke up and began to cry.

"I guess that it's dinner time!"  She said leaning over to exchange children.

"Erm have you ever done this before?"  He asked.  She raised her eyebrows.

"Surprisingly not.  But at this point in time I have one hungry child which my body is crying out to feed," She said moving around in the pillows " and I don't particularly feel like requesting an in-depth instruction session from our over-helpful hologram."  With that, to his shock, she undid the front of her robe and lifting the child's head slightly helped it find what it was looking for and after grimacing slightly as it latched on, relaxed into the process.  She was a natural!

            Neelix was in his element as he worked his way through the group of crewmembers that were all sitting centrally in the Mess hall.  He had thought that, even if the it was slightly belated, that a baby shower was definitely in order, so age two months Phoebe, Amy and Owen were having the first party thrown in their honour.  The guests of honour were still to arrive but everyone seemed to be enjoying them-selves.   The Talaxian headed towards the door as he saw the Commander walk in with three identically wrapped parcels in his arms.  

"Good evening!"  Said the host welcomingly.

"Neelix."  He responded smiling as he took in the scene around him.  He knew that in the few days after they had rescued the Captain and Lt Paris Chakotay had had severe doubts over whether he ought to have brought the children on board.  There had been some interesting and downright peculiar rumours floating around the ship.  Luckily as the Captain's natural joy and proficiency as a mother became apparent his fears had disappeared closely followed by most of the rumours.  

"No Captain yet?"  He asked searching the crowd.

"Not yet.  Why don't you put those down here he said indicating towards the table."  He suggested.

"Commander!"  Greeted Harry as he and B'Ellana approached them. " Whoa!"  He said soon distracted.  "Who's that one from?"  He indicated towards the buggy that was hovering a few inches off the ground.

" I believe that that would be a gift from Mr Vulcan."  Neelix smiled at the slight look of shock on the men's faces.  B'Ellana just held up the three stuffed bears (one beige, one chocolate brown, and the other black and white).

"I never saw him as the cuddly kind of guy."  She said.

            If Kathryn had learnt anything over the last few months it was that multi-tasking was the key to life.  As Owen finished eating his mum placed him gently onto the changing mat as she did up the front of her top.  She had also learned that Starfleet uniforms were not designed for women who were breastfeeding and without her regular caffeine boost mornings were sheer hell.  Running a brush through her hair she finished reading the security report she had started earlier and made her way out of the nursery.

"How are we doing?" She asked Tom who was busy tickling his daughters.

"We're ready if you are?  Oh let me give you a hand with that."  He offered as she caught her clip in her hair.  She had noticed before that he seemed to be particularly proficient at removing tangles from her hair so let him.

"Think so.  Will you get the toe-rag and the changing bag if I'll take these two little ladies?"

"Sure."  He responded.  As she waited for him she looked around her barely recognisable quarters.  By the time they had eventually been allowed out of sickbay B'Ellana had arranged for them to be extended so that they now included an extra bedroom for Tom and a spacious nursery for the three monsters.  Phoebe was gurgling away quite happily in her mothers arms, it even shocked her how much the child looked like her and Owen was almost an exact duplicate of his father but Amy was the perfect combination of the two with sparkling sapphires for eyes and a mass of auburn hair.

            B'Ellana   looked up as the couple arrived carefully managing to balance children and necessary equipment.

"Hiya," She said putting down her glass and looking down at the children in Janeway's arms.  She still hadn't quite figured out how the Captain or Tom managed to carry two of them at once.  They were so small and delicate.  She could never be so nurturing and motherly towards anything.  A pang of jealousy hit, how could they look so happy with their unusual relationship?

"Well take one of them wont you."  Janeway said drawing her attention back to the present.  "I'm parched."

"What do I…"  She began to ask but before she could finish she found herself with a wriggling little sleep suit.

"There you go.  Just make sure you support her head."  The Captain told her smiling warmly as she adjusted the child's' head slightly.  It was the most peculiar sensation to B'Ellana. This tiny living thing who after readjusting herself was falling asleep quite happy in her arms.  She began to walk and found that the whole experience wasn't nearly as horrific as she thought it might have been.

"B'Ellana," Called Harry who was now also carrying one of the star attractions, Owen.  "You look quite at home like that."  He commented as he shifted the cloth on his shoulder under the infant's head.

"You don't look so bad yourself Starfleet."

"I'll take that as a compliment."  He told her as they both sat down in a tucked away corner.

            The evening passed in a happy blur for Tom as he sat next to Kathryn and opened presents.  There were some gorgeous outfits from Chakotay; Tom always suspected that he had had good taste, and everything ranging from teething rings to matching teddy bears from other members of the crew.  He was so proud, of the children who behaved impeccably and of their mother who seemed to take just about everything in her stride.  She seemed like some kind of God to him as she not only balanced the needs of her three children but was also putting in as much effort as she could to doing her regular job.  Chakotay and the doctor were doing their best to ensure that she didn't do too much but it was usually he who chased her away from her desk and towards bed at some un-godly hour in the morning.  Tuvok approached looking surprisingly comfortable with Amy in his arms.  Amy didn't seem quite so comfortable.

"She seems unwilling to rest."  He told her mother who had stood up was retrieving the restless child.  Tom watched as she inserted a finger in her mouth and gently comforted her daughter.

"Don't worry she's been a bit out of sorts today.  She's probably just over tiered."  She reassured him.  "Speaking of such things it would probably be sensible if we headed back. Tom?"  

"Yup, with this lot to bath it'll be nearer morning before we hit the sack."  With that the triplets were retrieved and placed securely in the three detachable seats of the buggy.  As they walked down the corridor he was the first to speak.

"I think these may well be a God-send."  He said referring to the carriages.

"You're right I sometimes forget that Tuvok's been through all this before – more than once."

This was a thought that kept Tom thinking until they reached their quarters.  Tom did the baths as Kathryn gave them their nighttime feeds and things pretty much moved like clockwork.  He returned to the nursery with Owen wrapped in a towel.  Phoebe was already bedded and Amy was being held by her mother as she rocked gently in the nursing chair.

"She' s not hungry."  She said as Tom towelled his son dry and put a nappy on him.  He looked up but Kathryn's eyes were firmly fixed downwards.  She was a picture he thought.  Motherhood seemed to be wearing well on her she had a flush of well-being and her swollen chest had caught more eyes than just his own.

"Like you said - She's probably just over tired."  He suggested fastening Owen's baby-grow and lifting him clear and into his cot.

"Probably."  She conceded as she did the same with her daughter.  " Computer dim lights in the nursery to fifteen percent."

            Kathryn had always slept lightly and woke whenever one of her children did, even if it were just to be sent back to bed by Tom.  She sat bolt up right.  She couldn't hear anything but she new some thing was wrong.  She quickly clambered out of bed and pulling on her dressing gown tore across the living room.  Until her foot caught on one of the assorted pile of presents that lay on the floor from the previous night.  There was a sharp pain that started in her wrist and travelled all the way up to her elbow but she scrambled to her feet trying her best to ignore it.

"Kathy?"  Came a whispered voice from Tom's doorway.  "Are you all right?  What's the matter?"  She didn't answer him she just had to get to her daughter.  He followed her into the nursery and told the computer to lift the lights to fifty percent.  She was glad he did but didn't even take the time to acknowledge his presence.  As soon as she reached the side of Amy's crib she could hear the small infants laboured breaths.

"She's burning-up."  She said allowed without realising what she was doing.  She reached down inside and carefully lifted her out and into her arms.  Her skin was mottled with red patches and it was clear to see that she was in discomfort.  "Oh my God."  She whispered a thousand thoughts running through her head.  

"I'll call the EMH."  Said Tom.  She was glad of his apparent calm.  "You head down with her."  She held her daughter close to her as she rushed along the deserted corridors.  The feeling of helplessness was overwhelming.

            Kes arrived in sickbay only moments after the Captain and the EMH had whisked Amy away.  He had left her mother standing the shock plain to see on her face.  She new the doctor would never intentionally hurt any of the crew but he had little bedside manor as such, especially if he felt that a situation required his urgent attention.

"I'm sure the doctor's doing everything he can."  She told the fragile woman as she carefully guided her over to one of the bio-beds and encouraged her to sit down.  The doors opened again and Tom rushed in his face pale but somewhat more in control.

"Chakotay's with the Owen and Phoebe.  They seem fine but he's going to bring them down if anything happens."  He told both women but the Ocampan could see his concern more plainly than ever as his eyes meet Janeway's.

"I'm Sorry."  She said tears beginning to fall down her face.  "I should have known sooner.  If anything happens to her, to them…"  The tears prevented her from saying anymore as Tom crouched down so they were level.

"This isn't you're fault."  He told her placing his hands around hers.  "It isn't anybody's fault."  He reached round and held her tightly in his embrace.  It was when he backed away abruptly as the Captain yelped slightly that Kes realised something else must be wrong.

"Your arm?"  He asked eying the way she cradled it protectively.

"It's fine."  She said.

"No it's not.  She fell over on her way to the nursery."  Tom told Kes.

"If it's injured it would be better if I treat it now."  Kes told her.  They both helped move her round so that she sat on the bed the correct way round.  The shock was apparently setting in as she began to shake and the tears flowed freely.

"No.  Go help Amy."  She told her.  Knowing from experience that she would get no-where in an argument with the ships Captain she did as requested.

            Tom perched on the edge and careful not to further hurt her he slid an arm around her shoulder.  Neither of them said anything.  There was nothing for them to say.  It felt to him as if the world were in slow motion as they sat there holding hands and waiting for news of their daughter.  When it came it was good.

"She contracted an infection that has probably been present in the crew since they left the Alpha quadrant.  It was only so obvious here because of her age.  But I've brought her temperature down and she's breathing much more comfortably."  Tom breathed a sigh of relief.  "Kes has gone to check up on Phoebe and Owen, she'll give them a dose of medication that'll insure that they don't catch it as well but I'd like to keep Amy here – at least overnight, just to make sure."  Kathryn had been intent on staying also but as soon as the EMH had treated her injury he had virtually forced him to take her home.  Both Chakotay and Kes had been quick to leave when they returned to their quarters.  The doctor had been right she did look completely drained.  She didn't say a word as she stood between the two occupied cribs where her children were sleeping soundly.

"You should do what the doc suggested," He told her placing a hand on her shoulder.  "try and get some sleep."  

"She could have died."  Was the only response he received and it was completely hollow.

"Kathryn," He said forcing her to turn around.  "don't do this to your-self.  You can't be wonder woman!  You do a bloody good impression but you can't be everywhere at once and you can't control everything!"

"But…" She began to chastise herself.

"I know as well as everyone else on board this damned ship that you love our children too much to ever let anything happen to them and I love you too much to let you do this to your-self!"  He was gripping both her arms now and the sentiment behind his words was all too obvious in his voice.  He felt the world fall into slow motion again as she stared up into his eyes.  He looked away.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that."  

"No."  She said after a moment turning his face back towards hers.  "It's been a long time since anyone said that to me."  She paused and he felt as if she were taking in every detail of his features.  "And it's been even longer" She continued. "since I felt the same way in return."

            Chakotay supposed that the pairs development from co-habiters to couple, to husband and wife had been inevitable in a way but when he had performed their marriage ceremony three years ago he had also been all too aware of the possible problems the development could raise. They had seemed to deal with all the problems life had thrown them admirably though and if he was honest he was perhaps a little jealous if their togetherness.  He wasn't sure why his mind was drawn to these thoughts now as they waited for the  warp core to be re-integrated after retrieving it from the Cataati, who had in turn had used it to bargain after a botched transwarp test had led them to eject it.  The situation was made all the worse by the knowledge that both Tom and B'Ellana were floating in space rapidly running out of oxygen after a disastrous attempt to retrieve the warp core themselves.  He looked around as the turbo lift doors opened and Janeway flew out of them quickly followed by Seven of Nine the crew's latest recruit.  She looked slightly flushed as she headed straight for her husbands console and reconfigured the controls before handing it over to his stand-in.  He took the initiative and spoke before she could say anything.

"Mr Kim, transfer the co-ordinates for the origins of the distress signal to the conn."

"Already done sir."  Responded the young ensign whose face was pale with concern both for his best friend and fiancé.  The commander nodded his approval.

"Set in a course then engage – maximum warp."  He told the stand in.  He looked to the Captain who, to give her her due looked no more agitated than she would if any of her crew-men's lives were in danger.  She took a deep breath.

"I'll be in my ready-room.  Tell me when…"  There was no-need for her to finish the sentence.

            It was only five minutes before they got within sensor range but it felt like an eternity to the bridge crew.  Chakotay was uneasy to say the least; he looked from face to face finding little solace in the only calm expressions visible as they belonged to a Vulcan and a former Borg drone.  Harry Kim broke the silence.

"Entering sensor range."  He told them his fingers beginning to expertly skirt the controls.  It was a few moments before he spoke again.  "I'm only picking up one life sign and it's very weak.  But," He paused as he confirmed his readings. "I think it's Klingon."  The silence remained but the expectation of before was gone and it left an oppressive quality.

"Inform the doctor and beam her straight to sickbay as soon as we're in range."  Less than a minute later they confirmed that B'Ellana had arrived and was being treated by the doctor.  A quick glance at Tuvok insured that he would deal with the other crewmember.

"On you go."  He said to Kim and stood up and headed for the ready room.  She would have been able to tell they had dropped out of warp but…  She looked up from where she sat looking at the stars through the view port.  His sombre expression obviously told her all she needed to know.

"And B'Ellana?"  She asked keeping her voice level with audible effort.

"She's in sickbay being treated."  He told her.  She nodded mutely and he was about to near her when the doors slid open again.  Three little expectant faces peered around the corner to this almost unknown domain.

"Neelix said we could come and show you these if we behaved very well."  Said the little boy.

"What's wrong?"  Asked Phoebe picking up on the atmosphere.  Chakotay looked to their mother who just called them close to her.  They ran up and piled onto her knee or as close as they could get.

"I'm afraid there's been an accident."  She told them taking the time to gently stroke each of their heads or brush their cheek. "And Daddy isn't going to be coming home."  The stark brutality of what she told them seemed to pass right over their heads as she fought to keep her composure.

"But who's going to finish reading our story?"  Asked Amy in child-like innocence.

"I'm sure Harry or Chakotay will finish it for you."  She reassured them smiling wanly.

"In fact," He cut in trying to relieve their mother. "why don't I take you down now and we might get in two chapters tonight."  They looked to Kathryn who nodded, then silently approached him and taking his hands left the room.

            Kathryn sighed as she watched them leave.  They were four, only four!  They were still her babies.  She noticed the large pad that Owen had left lying on the seat next to her picking it up she activated the screen.  It was a 2D representation of the holo-pick that the EMH had taken of them at the welcome party the chief morale officer had thrown for Seven.  He was so young she thought as she traced his face with the tip of her finger and slowly she began to let the pain surface.  She was barely aware as her old companion walked through the doors.  He sat down next to her and uncharacteristically placed a comforting hand on her arm.

"It's not fair." She told him before burying her tearstained face in the shoulder of his crisp uniform.  And there they sat until completely exhausted she fell into an uneasy sleep. 

            Gently Tuvok laid her head down on the sofa and deftly covered her form with the blanket that had always been hidden in the room.  Carefully he removed her comm. badge and de-activated it.  He told the computer to dim the lights then after taking a moment to watch her form that even in sleep showed the signs of her distress; he exited the room and locked the door.  He had known her a long time but never had he seen her so heartbroken.  She had always taken great care to cover her emotions and the mask she wore rarely came down – even in only his presence but today she had not been able to help it, no years of Star Fleet training or hardening could prepare her for this loss.  He walked purposefully across the bridge and into the turbo-lift.

"Crew quarters Deck three."  He told the computer once the doors had shut.  He could have contacted the Commander over the comm. but he was aware that he had no idea of his position and that subtlety would be required when it came to the rest of the crew.  As he approached the door and before he entered, stopped and listened to hear if he could find sounds of life.  There was the rustle of sheets but that was all.  He entered without making a sound.  Chakotay was just leaving the girls bedroom.

"How is she?"  He asked in a hushed whisper.

"Sleeping – just.  She exhausted herself crying."

"Good."  If he was slightly surprised by the comment he didn't let it show. "At least she's not going to try and bottle it all up."  He gave the Commander his due.  He may have had feelings for the Captain at one point but he obviously cared enough not to interfere when she had found happiness with Lt. Paris and now – again - he judged her well.

"The children?"  He enquired.

"They're sleeping to but I think the truth might be dawning on them.  They were asking for Kathryn."

"I placed her _incommunicado.  _I thought it better she not be disturbed."

"Mmmm."  The Native American agreed.  "I'll stay here tonight if you could check with the doctor about B'Ellana."  The Vulcan nodded mutely and turned to leave.

            The last two days had been hell for B'Ellana.  It had been a little over two hours after she had been beamed on board that she had regained consciousness and found Harry sitting next to her bed.  Her first thought upon realising where she was and what had happened was 'Where was Tom?"  She remembered that he had stopped talking to her minutes before she herself had slipped into silence.  Her fiancé had told her the news.  He was gutted, she could tell no matter how often he held her close and told her that he was so glad she was alive.  The ex-con had been his best friend since they had set foot on _Voyager_ and Harry would gladly have given his life for him.  But now, now he was gone.  Not just their best friend but also the Captain's husband and a father of three.  Janeway hadn't been to see her either in sickbay or in her quarters where she was being forced to convalesce, but that was hardly surprising really.  By all accounts she had kept a pretty low profile and when she was seen she seemed pale and drained – a shadow of her former self.

"Are you ready?"  Came Harry's soft voice from outside the bathroom door.

"Just coming."  She replied shaking herself from her thoughts and pulling the brush through her hair one last time.  She held his arm as they walked down the corridor.  Everyone was headed in the same direction and most wore the same sombre expression.  The mood was amplified tenfold when they arrived in the mess hall-come-funeral parlour.  The service was conducted by Chakotay and his words were to the point as he described the one they had lost.  He spoke of lost souls finding homes and peace.  And read part of an old earth eulogy that was reserved for those who gave their lives for their people:

            _They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:_

_            Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn._

_            At the going down of the sun and in the morning_

_            We will remember them._

It seemed to fit Tom and his death remarkably well.  As he finished the casket was released into space.  B'Ellana glanced at his widow who stood looking completely numb, then she was brought back down to earth as the quite sobs of her children broke through the silence.  Quickly and quietly she turned and ushered them out of the public gaze.  The half-Klingon guessed that it was partly for her own benefit that she had left before her husband's body had disappeared forever.  She thought of the solid foundation and steadfast rock that the crew had come to see their Captain as, and realised that there had just been a huge chip carved out of her.

            Owen didn't know why his mother was making such a big fuss.  They had only missed half an hour of class and the holo-deck program they were running hadn't been anything but an innocent forest glade back on earth.  He new she was stressed – his sisters were constantly on at him for adding to the problem, but that wasn't an excuse for her being completely over the top.

"But Mum..." He began to protest.

"Don't 'But Mum' me."  She told him standing up from behind her desk.  The fact that she had summoned them to her ready-room had spoken volumes to her son who could count on the fingers of one hand how often he had been there before.  "Both of you are coming up to your Academy entrance exams I would have thought that your attentions would have been focussed on your school work rather than romance."  She said glancing at Naomi Wildman then back towards him.

"Mum!  I'm almost seventeen it's not like we're kids anymore."

"I know that and if you had let me finish you would have found out that I really don't have any problems with your relationship – as long as you're sensible.  However I'm not going to let you skip class and get away with it."  She sat back down and avoided eye contact as she finished.  "Owen your holo-deck privileges are cancelled for the next week along with your access to the shuttle bay.  Naomi I'll leave your punishment to your mother."

"What!"  He exclaimed.  She sure new how to hit him where it hurt.  He lived to fly and was a natural by all accounts.  His sisters interests might lie in more sensible settings, Amy in medicine and Phoebe was hardly out of engineering, but… Well he just loved to fly and dreamed not only of piloting shuttles through asteroid belts but also of being helmsman of _Voyager_.

"If you have a problem with this we can discuss it at dinner.  Now I believe Seven is expecting you."  They trooped out in silence.  Once they were alone in the corridor he slipped his hand into Naomi's.

"I'm sorry."  He said trying not to show the anger that he felt towards his mother.

"Why?  My mum would probably have done the exact same thing.  Anyway she does have a point!"

He new she was teasing him so he just shot a hand out and tickled her side.  She giggled manically and the smile that spread across her lips reminded him of why being with her was worth any punishment his mother 'the Captain' could dole out.

            "Enter."  Came the distracted voice from inside the ready-room.  Chakotay entered to find her, as ever, half hidden by reports and requests.

"Chakotay what can I do for you?"  She asked only briefly glancing up from her work.

"Eat lunch with me."  He replied simply and watched as she checked her chronometer.  She had lost track of time – again.

"OK but I don't think I could face another of Neelix's concoctions today, how about if we eat here?"  He new that she had an ulterior motive for not wanting to go to the mess; she had avoided it on this day for the last thirteen years.

"Sure."  He replied and headed over to the replicator.  She had never been a big eater but he new that she was getting worse for missing meals rather than better.  He sat and watched as she stirred her soup listlessly.

"A little bird tells me you're planning on moving house."  He said gently broaching the subject he had come to discuss.

"Yes."  She replied quite simply putting down her spoon and sitting back.  "It was only a matter of time and well now seemed the perfect opportunity.  The triplets want to move into regular crew quarters, which, I suppose, is understandable, and Harry and B'Ellana are going to need the space with their second coming.  Then Charlotte and David can move into theirs.."

"And you get left with a regular set of rooms."  He finished.

"Yes and that's all I need."  She told him.  Chakotay didn't disagree with what she had said but was intrigued.

"What happened to Captain's privileges?"  He asked.

"I believe that privilege is subjective.  I have my children and my health and a crew that would be the envy of any Captain.  What greater privileges are there than these?"  He didn't answer.  There was no need.  He just sat and watched as she stared out into the depths of space.  He could have sworn he saw a tear well up in her eye but within a blink it was gone.

            Neelix stared up in wonder at the sight before his eyes.

"It's magnificent!"  He said unable too take his eyes of the winter wonderland that stood before him.  There were stalls selling candy and hot chestnuts, there were merry-go-rounds and Ferris wheels all lightly dusted with feather white snow.  And at the bottom of the park an ice-rink over looked by trees had been created where already many of the crew seemed to be trying their hand at skating.  It was one of the children by his side that caused his attention to be brought back to the task in question.  He had eight charges all-together ranging in age from three to thirteen.  He wasn't entirely sure how he was going to cope but he was sure that he would somehow.

"Neelix, can we go on that?"  Asked Alex, Harry and B'Ellana's daughter pointing at the carousel.

"Yes!  Why not, that seems a good a place as any to start.  Everyone hold hands."  Once they were he set off into the throng of people (mostly holographic).  Stepping back he nodded to the operator that they were all ready to go and the music struck up.

"Neelix!"  He was surprised to her a voice call over to him from the other side of the thorough-fair.  He couldn't see who it was until Phoebe and Amy pushed their way through the crowd dragging their mother behind them.

"Captain, girls."  He acknowledged as they neared.  He took them in they had grown up so fast and he realised that what he saw before them were not girls but young ladies.  "And aren't we looking splendid today."  He commented and they did.  The rosy cheeks they had due to the cold filled their faces with colour.  And their mother – well she wasn't wearing uniform an occurrence that had become less frequent as her children had grown up and spending time with them had ceased to mean getting absolutely filthy.  Instead she was wearing a traditional style double-breasted earth jacket that reached almost to the ground.  It's warm Christmas red highlighted her hair and the intricate black velvet buttons added a touch of class.  Neelix suspected that it was holographic but either way it suited her marvellously.

"Neelix do you need a hand looking after that lot?"  Amy asked hopefully indicating towards the children on the ride who seemed to be having the time of their lives.

"I certainly wouldn't say no."  He admitted.

"You wouldn't mind if we abandoned you would you?"  Phoebe asked turning to look at their mother.

"Well I suppose as your brother's already ditched us for more interesting pursuits…"  She smiled at them.  "Just don't bring them back too late!"  She told the Talaxian teasingly waggling her finger at him.

            Kathryn leaned over the barrier at the rink as she watched those brave enough to take to the ice from the sidelines.  She felt old and tiered.  The fact that she was significantly older than the majority of her crew had always been there in the back of her mind but this journey was beginning to take it's toll on everyone.  She almost jumped as someone placed a hand on her back.

"Looking for company?"  Chakotay asked as he took up position next to her. "I didn't expect to see you here."  He told her.  In all honesty she hadn't planned on coming but her daughters thought that she should get away from work for a while.  They had noticed that she always chose to become more engrossed in it at the time of the anniversary of their father's death and they were probably right it was time she got away from it all for a while.

"Come with me," Her Commander said taking her elbow in his strong grip "there's something I want you to see."  She had no idea where she was being taken until they stopped at the base of the big wheel.  She noticed that he had a word with the holo-graphic operator before guiding her into one of the carriages.  She took a seat and wrapped herself tighter in her coat.  As the wheel began slowly to turn it left her with a feeling of leaving her problems far behind on the ground.  Chakotay sat at a comfortable distance happy to watch the view as they reached the top the machinery ground to a halt.  She looked out and to her delight she could see almost all her crew laughing and joking enjoying the dramatic change in scenery.  All of a sudden an immense feeling of warmth and well being settled on her.  She heard a voice that she immediately recognised:

_No matter what happens Kathy, no matter what we do_

_No matter if one of us is taken away, you'll never be alone again, _

_Because I will always be with you - from now until eternity._

Tom had told her that that first night after he had confessed his love and it had comforted her so much now as the gently wind blew her words away she told him only loud enough for him to hear:

"I love you to."  A few moments later they began to move again but the world they returned to didn't seem nearly as horrific as the one she had left behind.

THE END

Please tell me what you think!

voyager_obsessive@yahoo.co.uk

A/N:  Ok so I changed the rather Freudian error I made in the first post – thanks to 'me' whoever you are (!)  And as I think this proves – I need a beta.  Any offers greatly appretiated.


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